"I'm in Lesbians with you"

I'm just going to work backwards cause it helps me remember things. Today was my first pay day with Denny's. Yay monies!!! Work... it has it's ups and downs. Today wasn't a great day. It wasn't terrible either. I think I'm just tired today and I may be getting sick. I feel kind of hot right now and that's making me feel a little irritable. A coworker of mine asked if I was a lesbian today and kept going on about it. It was funny at the time but now I just feel annoyed by it all. I'm sure I'm overreacting but I'm a little worried that this coworker will tell people jokingly and then they'll assume things and I don't want to be seen as something I'm not. I feel like bad things could happen. I don't know. Let it be known that I am terrible at video games. I used to be able to get through games but now, it's a little embarrassing. Sam and I played TimeSplitters. I had fun, I'm just not very good and I let him know that. Sam's brother, Ben, was there for a little bit, but he left us to hang with his girlfriend, Amber. We kept playing for a while and then Sam's coworker and friend, Michael joined us. We mostly played in the arcade and did some of the challenges. With the challenges, it was mostly Sam and Michael. I tried twice but it was just bad. Just dreadful. Michael doesn't have the internet so he really wanted to browse through Youtube and show us a song called "You might be a Mormon". It's all silly but jolly good fun all the same. We ended up watching the Divine Comedy's Lord of the Engagement Ring Trilogy. Good, clean humor. I'd seen it before but it had been a while. It was getting late so Sam kicked Michael out. I don't remember how it happened but Sam ended up lying on the floor and was holding onto my leg, trying to get me to fall down. I ended up just sitting by Sam's head and he told me the history of his pillows. I also discovered that we both like orange juice and lemons. Something small but I really liked just talking with him. I actually didn't say much but it was nice all the same. I really like him :) As of this last Wednesday it's been two weeks. It's weird and crazy and fun. I'm trying not to worry about things so much. I've been stressed about work and about how things are going to work with Sam but I need to stop doing that. I should care and put effort into everything but I shouldn't let doubts and fears overwhelm me. If Denny's doesn't want me, it wouldn't be the most terrible thing ever. If Sam decided to dump me, it would hurt but I know that I could get over it with time and prayers. I know what I want out of my life and that's all I can really work on right now. Anyway! Sam's birthday was this last Monday. I built him a cake with the help of Alyse Cherry and Amy Munn. They are both awesome and fill my life with laughter. I have a picture that I'd like to post but I can't find the chord to do so maybe another day. He really liked the cake and I really liked making it for him. We held a little party at Hans's. There was dancing, hot dogs, love sacs, and Quelf. Oh how I love Quelf!!! My children will grow up with that game!

Sam met my family, well most of them in one setting. He worked for my dad, he met my mom when he helped with the piano moving project and again when I made him dinner. He met Shannon briefly at Papa John's and apparently she glared at him. I don't know. He knew Amber from when she lived in Kingman but other than that he'd never met anyone else. It was a bit soon, I think it had been a week and a half but most of my family was here so it seemed like an opportune moment. I wasn't really expecting him to come to the birthday party but he did. What a champ! Everyone had been asking me questions about him and in all honesty, I didn't really know. I knew he had a mine and I only knew that from a few days earlier. I knew that he grew up in Hawaii and served a mission in Oakland, California. I still don't know his favorite color or anything too specific. I know he likes country music. The Mesa Temple was his first temple to go through. He destroyed his face once while riding a bike, He's the middle child. He knows how to cook, he knows computer stuff, he's a hard worker, he doesn't want to go to college, his middle name is Sterling. Just little things but I love that kid. I think I kind of fell for him when he told me he was trying to impress me on our first date. I know I'm sounding crazy right now but your brain is on drugs when you're in love so I can blame it on that. I haven't said the "L" word to him but I can see myself being happy with him for the rest my life. Nothing is guaranteed though. I think now that we've started talking more it's getting worse. Or better, depending on how you see it. I'm just going to go with it. Be myself and have fun :)